


things you said while we were driving

by aphwhales



Series: things we said [7]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Discussion of Past Decapitation, Drabble, Earth C (Homestuck), M/M, Past Character Death, Post-Sburb/Sgrub
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 00:11:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14841869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aphwhales/pseuds/aphwhales
Summary: “Jake,” you say quietly, putting a hand on his shoulder. He jolts. “Jake, pull over.”





	things you said while we were driving

You never learned to drive after the game. Or, you tried, but you were never able to get your license. Something about never checking your blind spots. You hated learning anyway.  
Jake drives, though. He likes the freedom, you think. He’s not the best, but he was good enough to get his license. He was so excited when he came back from his road test. 

It’s raining today, but you’re warm in the passenger seat of Jake’s truck. He’s driving, oddly quiet. Usually he hums along with the radio, despite being far from on tune. You glance at his hands and they’re white knuckled, shaking despite his tight grip on the wheel. 

The road is nearly empty. No one wants to be out today, and this was already a quiet road. “Jake,” you say quietly, putting a hand on his shoulder. He jolts. “Jake, pull over.” 

He does as you say, jerkily pulling off to the right shoulder. “Wh-what?”  
“What’s wrong?” You reach over and turn the wipers off, and put the car in park. “Dude, relax a bit. You don’t need to be pressing on the brake like that right now. That’s why I put it in park.”

Jake pulls his foot off the pedal, but doesn’t relax. In fact, his frown gets deeper, and he looks like he might cry. His chin is dimpled, and he won’t look at you. Usually, you’re the only person he can make eye contact with. 

You unbuckle your seatbelt and shift to fold your legs on the seat so you can face Jake. His eyes are somewhat glassy, and you lean over the console and tap his chin. “What’s up?”

“I’m just fine, Dirk.” 

You roll your eyes. “Bullshit. You always tell me how well you can read me. I can read you pretty well too, bro.” Not really, you’re shit with body language, comes with the whole autism package, but it’s so obvious. He’s clenching and unclenching his fists, and he keeps tapping his foot now that it doesn’t need to be on the pedals. And that’s besides the dimple on his chin and the frown he’s trying to keep under control.

“It’s just - I told you,” he tries again. “It’s nothing.”

 

“Jake,” You say, trying to sound stern, but you probably just sound sad, and either way, it guilts him into talking. 

“It’s. It’s stupid. I was talking to Jane and she mentioned that today was the day we entered the game.” Jake pushes up his glasses - green frames and smudged lenses, always - and rubs furiously at his eyes. Gently - you always try to be gentle with him, because he deserves it - you pull his wrists away from his face. Rest them on the console between you.

You wish desperately that the console wasn’t there. You want to hold him tight and never let him go.  
He leans into you and cries into your shoulder. You hold him over the console. “I-I’m s-sorry, it’s just. You didn’t a-acknowledge it and I know you probably don’t think it’s a big deal but -” Jake rambles on about your first decapitation. If you were meaner, you would tell him that because you’re a Heart player, and because of science, you were still somewhat conscious of where your decapitated head was.

You felt him throw it away like trash when he realized you and the girls were there. You don’t tell him that. You will never tell him that. You do tell him this: 

“It was a big deal for me. But I had to get you guys in.”

Jake cups your face with his hands. He’s still crying, so you lean in and kiss him just beneath his eyes. “You never had to do that,” he whispers. “Dirk, there must have been other ways.” 

“There weren’t,” you reply. He frowns and glances away. “And. And I can’t. I can’t promise that if another situation like that came up, I wouldn’t do something like that again.” 

“I know,” Jake tells you, voice breaking. “That’s what makes this all so frightening.”

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr](flotsems.tumblr.com)


End file.
